Those of you who work with me know that this has been a theme for the past year - discipline. Discipline in the best sense brings us exactly what we want. It is required for any goal that requires hard work and time - and that is most worthwhile goals.
Some prospective coaching clients have said, "I want to hire you to help me get everything done." My reply is, "Getting everything done at once is not typically possible, if you have a wide variety of interests and a big appetite - which most people interested in coaching do. What I can help you do, is get the most important things done. And I can help you gain clarity about what those things are. That's where 90% of your enjoyment and satisfaction in life is going to come from."
When I mention the word "discipline" it can elicit a groan. Too often, we associate discipline with not being able to have what we want. For instance:
- Discipline about eating might mean no dessert.
- Discipline about exercise might mean physical discomfort or pain.
- Discipline about sales calls might mean many rejections.
- Discipline in relationship might mean missing out on other people.
All of these things are ones where you might say, "THAT'S not what I want!" I WANT dessert, comfort, acceptance and attention from lots of people. But these are all short-term, immediate gratification things. Of course you want them. But what do you want most? Think about discipline not taking away the examples above, but bringing you these wonderful results:
- Healthy weight, teeth, and sleep.
- Health, strength, endurance and confidence.
- Business success and business relationships that would not happen otherwise.
- The opportunity to develop a committed relationship with one person, and actually work through things, which will grow you as a person.
We are presented with hundreds of choices, every single day. From "what should I do next" to "what will I order for lunch?" to "should I invest some time and money in this person or pursuit", the quality of your choices determines the quality of your life.
In order to make quality choices, you need to be clear about the Vision you're after. This work encompasses getting clear on your Values and Needs. Great stuff to work with a coach on (more about these areas in future posts). Once you're clear on these things, discipline about making choices in alignment with your Vision, Values and Needs will get you there.
For most of us, discipline is an ongoing quest. Like a physical muscle, it will get stronger the more you exercise it. And making the shift from "discipline=deprivation" to "discipline brings me what I really want!" is key to exercising it.
If you were to focus on just one area this month where exercising more discipline would bring you way more of what your really want, what would it be? I'd love to hear from some of you on this, and then hear about your results in the coming weeks.
